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About Deviant Artist Core Member Doctor HammerMale/United States Recent Activity
Deviant for 11 Years
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Given by Shyree
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So some guy buys an old Jimi Hendrix album and just loves it. It’s so beautiful. Geezus just listen to that solo! But how was it done? Was Jimi a magician with super powers? He must be!

Time passes and the guy starts ‘understanding’ what he’s listening to. “Wait!” says the guy in a moment of arrogance that he thinks is clarity “That’s a guitar! It’s just a piece of wood with strings. That’s the trick. I thought this beautiful sound was coming out of Jimi’s ass, but it’s a trick. It’s a guitar!” So this guy buys a guitar. He has plenty of cash and even more self confidence so it’s a drop in bucket. Why? He’s going to play a Jimi Hendrix solo. Is he inspired and wants to learn to play the guitar, and ya know, write songs and stuff? Hell the fuck no! Jimi didn’t do that! This guy knows exactly how Jimi made art. I mean, if it’s even art. He cheated! He used wooden tools and amplifiers. Yeah, this guy is gonna show the world that there’s a trick to making those sounds, and in no way is Jimi a visionary or even an artist. It’s all a trick. So he sits there with his guitar and can’t play a fucking note and it doesn’t matter. Ya see, he knows that Jimi couldn’t either, and this guy is gonna prove it. He’s gonna debunk Jimi Hendrix.

So this guy invents a little gadget (He names it the Note-u-lator) that that plays each single note on the CD that Jimi plays in this guy’s chosen solo. It just plays it over and over. Then the guy takes his guitar and plays every note on the neck of his guitar till it matches the CD's corresponding note. Then on his “Record-u-lator” he sounds the correct note. The duration of each note is measured by using a sun dial. Those are available at your local hardware store. “Oh Jimi! I got you now.” He does this over and over. It’s painstaking, but hey, This is what Jimi did. It takes this guy four fucking years to finish his solo. But at the end it was so worth it. Here it is, proof that Jimi Hendrix Was just a goofy old mechanic, and anyone with four years and a whatever-u-lator can do the same thing. I mean, this guy has a bloodless, stilted copy of Jimi’s solo! It’s proof! And I for one will never look at Jimi’s songs the same. He’s a fraud!

Why am I telling this ridiculous story? Because I saw 'Tim’s Vermeer' last night. Penn and Teller should be ashamed of themselves for being so afraid of any art they can’t make that they need to debunk it. Yeah, Vermeer used optics. He’s not a fucking wizard, he’s a painter. He’s not magic, he is just a hard working visionary. He’s like Jimi Hendrix, who used tools and discipline to write and perform songs. Fuck you, Tim, you self obsessed turd, for not just taking an art class. Your conclusion was embarrassing. Debunk Wu Tang Clan next: "Wait! That's just a part of someone else's song! They cheated! I can do this! Just give me four years and I'll make a bad copy of C.R.E.A.M. ... Because I'm a fucking idiot."

I’ve decided That I will no longer show my current series of paintings on the internet. I’m not even gonna photograph them. I don’t want the image removed from the object, or the experience removed from the direct commune with the object. My object: painting, exists as a singular event, not as a concept, illustration or a even a narrative. The image is an integral part of the object and I feel it must be seen as such. The paint, the canvas, the hand… all the things that have been shit on for 50 years of Academic* dogma are what I want to show you.

I will absolutely show my work. It doesn’t exist till it’s seen. When you are moved, amused, offended, humbled, elated, bored, or part of these objects, they function. They are not concepts, and they are not dialogue contingent, they are EXPERIENCE CONTINGENT. Therefore an image of them I will not propagate. This isn’t Performance Art, or an Installation. In contrast, it’s simply creating a sacred space for people to view an object that was crafted with intention. Ya know: a gallery! Or even a rented warehouse because nobody wants to show them. Whatever. I’ll figure that shit out later.

Why am I doing this? Because I’m pissed. I’m pissed because I can’t fucking stand walking by the the New Museum. It’s a pile of soulless excrement with an ironic boat stuck to it. It hates my humanity, and insults my need to experience the sublime. I’m pissed that almost every gallery I see seems to despise everything I love. It all reminds me that the Academy has suppressed magicians and rewarded incompetent cowards whose only artistic talent is kissing the bloated, ever-out of touch Academy. I feel like I have to stop turning away. 

I do this in direct opposition to Conceptual Art and its descendants.

I piss in Duchamp’s Fountain.

I don’t fear the esthetic. I don’t despise illusion or magic. I don’t believe that art, unlike science, is a linear event wherein we must move forever forward. I see that 100 years of missteps and false directions have put us so far off the path of Truth, that to continue on it makes my bones ache.

Without shame, I will attempt to put authorial presence, expression, skill, intent, illusion, grace, and fucking Truth into my world - Into my work.

I am making objects to dream upon and commune with, not oblique statements so philosophers can call themselves artists, and critics can call themselves philosophers. 

To create change, sometimes you have to risk being seen as an idiot… Or actually being one.

This I decide only for my current doings. The series of paintings I’m working on are specifically a condemnation of the bullshit that has been shoved down our throats by teachers, critics, galleries, museums and philosophers for the past 50 years. I don’t condemn work shown on the internet. I love seeing stuff online. I love VISUAL ART! I fucking make it! So I’ll stick around and discuss stuff, and look at your work and be inspired by it. And maybe I’ll post some things that aren’t a part of the series of paintings I’m working on.

I love you,


[* “Academic” is was used in the true sense of the word. Not in the sense of Academic = Traditional, but in the sense that it is the position of the current Academy.]

Devpost by Doc-Hammer
That's me painting. Yes, that’s a denim apron. I think if I can look like a mom making god’s eyes with a Brownie troop, it will only help my work. 

I’m painting again. It’s been what? Like seven years? More? Less? I’ve no idea. I forgot almost everything about the process of painting. Every recipe, every method, everything. Each painting I’m working on is constructed differently. Changing everything. The ground, the medium, the order, the pigments… I’ve no fucking clue what I’m doing. Miraculously, it’s given me a freedom to move untethered. I’m a hungry student again.

I feel like I’ve been dropped back into a high school English class. I know so fucking much about the power and arrangement of words, but it doesn’t matter because I can’t spell, and I can’t remember what a gerund is. I think the teacher is younger than I am, and everything in my ape brain says “If I fight him and steal his wife, would I get an ‘A’? Is there any way out? What the fuck am I doing here getting my ass humbled?”

Why do I do this? Honestly, what is my drive? Approval? Geezus, that can’t be it. I mean, humanity has already placed me in a specific corner of the room. I’m the Venture guy. Anything else I do will look like a hobby, and be “approved” of as such. “Nice job, Venture guy! Where’s my next season?” (NOTE: It’s coming, it’ll be great, and Venture is eternally a huge and beautiful part of my life… I can do many things at once. Ya gotta trust me.) So approval can’t be it. For fun? Do I paint for fun? Ummm, fuck no. Painting brings me a constant crisis of faith. It’s a miserable process of balancing never ending disappointments on the trembling back of your expectations. True, there are moments of glorious understandings that fill the entire body with intoxications unavailable through pharmaceuticals. A glimpse of Truth that almost explains every ‘why’ you’ve pondered. But for the most part, painting makes my heart hurt.

So what’s the reason I do this? Okay, fine, I’ll give you the goo in my chest, the blood in my veins, and the tears locked behind my eyeballs: I feel I must paint. I must paint alone and consider nothing but my esthetics. No opinions, voices, judgments, kudos, praise, scorn or demands but my own. It’s torture. Every stroke keeps me alive or pierces my heart. I must drive myself like a hateful employer. Maybe I’m proving something to myself. Or! Maybe some asshole broke into my parents house, and as a joke leaned over my crib and whispered “You are the greatest painter of your generation, now prove it, you worthless shithead.” Or! Maybe we have a destiny. Okay, wait, hear me out! I don’t mean that we have a fate. That we can’t make choices, and everything happens for a reason. C’mon, that isn’t what saying. I’m saying that maybe life is a journey from A to B. There is a path that we feel below our feet. We know when we’re on it. And we know when we’ve walked off of it. And at our worst, we know when we’ve strayed so far off the path that we are just fucking full-on lost. Ya see what I’m saying? Like, we still make choices, change our fate, and control our destiny. But it sure feels like this “destiny” has carved a path for us that we can either take, or not… But I think the thing with somebody breaking into a child’s bedroom and setting the seeds of later torments is probably what happened. I mean, messing around with the cosmic unknowable is fun and all, but I know my parents didn’t always keep our front door locked when I was a tyke.

I love you,

Doc Hammer


Doc-Hammer's Profile Picture
Doctor Hammer
United States
Current Residence: NYC
deviantWEAR sizing preference: Like a women's medium.
Favourite genre of music: Snore Core, and my band "WEEP"
Favourite photographer: I liked Helmut Newton when I was a kid... Probably still do.
Favourite style of art: Style? Ummm, heartfelt and honest, but not "clever".
Operating System: Mac, G5
MP3 player of choice: Extra-old, 10G ipod
Shell of choice: Shell Levene (Ya know, Glengarry Glen Ross)
Wallpaper of choice: William Morris, in pale greens.
Skin of choice: Ummm, girl skin? Like, extra-soft girl skin.
Favourite cartoon character: Dr. Girlfriend, Master Billy Quizboy, Henchman No.21
Personal Quote: If your work can be easily copied, it should be.


Add a Comment:
hygymyty Featured By Owner Nov 2, 2015
Mr. Hammer...your show, The Venture Bros., is AMAZING. I am a huge, HUGE fan.

Go Team Venture!
tundar Featured By Owner May 19, 2015
Big fan of the whole venture universe... sorry if this annoys you. I think it's art related...

The logos! for venture industries and the guild! any of the logos... are those yours? My questions are I guess (if you did them), first, what were you thinking? I ask because I think they are very good. I would never think of things like that. I usually think of logos as very simple but, take the guild's for example, looks like the best class ring ever, but I like it a lot. Maybe because of the sense of humor it's made with, but I also think it's really cool in a childish sort of way. (I sometimes enjoyed pretending to be the bad guys as a kid.)

Are any of these yours? Your thoughts on them? Not sure how many questions that is, but any related reflections on this would make my day. Thanks.
Doc-Hammer Featured By Owner May 28, 2015

The logos on Venture? Yeah, I did those. It’s funny that you think they’re not simple. They are all one color and have no halftones. That’s pretty simple. Not quite Saul Bass simple, but not too far away. The Guild one is slightly more complex. Ya see, they founded their organization when logos were more ornate. Theirs is more based on heraldry than a corporate logo. Sure, the Guild now is a corporate entity of sorts, but they began as group of hero’s protecting The O.R.B.’s secret. After infighting they splintered and formed The Guild of Calamitous Intent. Oh, I really overthink this shit. Cartoons are serious business!

tundar Featured By Owner Jun 3, 2015
lol saul bass... but yeah that's exactly what I meant. Just that it's not mostly basic shapes and letters in the blank spaces and that you are generous with the number of imagery / symbols :) a dragon, a globe, the letters and a skull!

You've made me love that skull btw. It's almost embarrassing to describe how happy I was when the skull slowly made its way toward me in the beginning of the trailer to season 6 as the music started up.

Thanks for the reply :)
NuntiusAutem Featured By Owner Edited Mar 30, 2015
As it were, by some string of choices made my way to typing this comment. I'm not sure what I'm doing, but if I get rid of all the voices from the perceived "eyes on me" it feels a lot easier to express myself. I'm constantly haunted with thoughts of where I am suppose to be going. Why am I letting all of these eyes influence what I do? Where ever passion is found in my heart, fear seems to creep about. What the fuck am I afraid of? Insecurity? Assuming I was destitute, I would still have my mind, my thoughts, my words. Or rather, still I think, I speak, I choose. Then what is destitute when life carry's on?

I feel like everyone thinks in terms of "the end" or "the beginning". Like the typical first relationship, with all the goo goo coos and puppy love that ends abruptly with the mental trauma that comes with experiencing bloody sheets for the first time. Heartbreak. But then 10 or 20 years later the experience matures into a funny story. Kinda like mushrooms from cow shit. Everything keeps moving, always in motion.

What aches my heart... is what I love doing best. It is a secret I keep. I will take my True role in life to the grave because it's that beautiful to me. I cry. At the same time, I feel incredibly loved to have found it, which brings me harder into tears. Elation on the backside of sorrow, what a coin. I want to see your paintings, the curiosity will tear me if I do nothing. Because I now see your Spirit, I have been wrapped up in the experience of your Schrodinger creations. I believe they exist and yet I've never seen them. That statement is crazy and in truth, very, very, heartbreaking.

 I don't care what you make of it, but things are lining up and I see the path lining up ahead. It's very hazy, but I know I am being guided in a way. Turns out I will be in L.A. around May 19. I don't even know if that's where you are, or if you even live in Cali. Fair assumption? Stop your crucifying stare. I'm there for vacation anyway.

Either way, If I die not seeing them, that's how I experience your creation. Now I feel Venture Bros was just a toe dip. I have the [AS] stream going right now. What I love about the series is underlying stuff. Everything is painstakingly chosen, every word, the order of events, like the brush strokes of a painting. Whats more, the experience occurs over the span of my existence, each re-run giving me something new and subtle to mentally chew on. Thank you for what you have given. I could not have invented that flavor of Love in my wildest imagination; sometimes it cries me into laughter. It makes me feel very loved to experience that laughter. Thank you so much, whatever you are.

You are very loved for what you are. I'm not talking about the love from a fan, but the Love that is in All . You change universes whether you know it or not. I enjoy your sunlight. It means Infinity to me.

I love you too,

powerman2000 Featured By Owner Mar 2, 2015
Doc-Hammer on Deviantart ? Awwww Snap !
I remember getting on an Escalator in Atlanta, and being right behind you dude !
ImaLumpyMonkey Featured By Owner Feb 14, 2015  Student General Artist
EricFinnertyArt Featured By Owner Feb 2, 2015
I don't look at you as the "Venture guy". I see you as a artsee-fartsie  guy. ;) Love the work dude, I see what you mean. -Eric
caesaraugustus Featured By Owner Jan 17, 2015  Hobbyist Traditional Artist
I hate you! Now make more cartoons! ;)
AnielaAbair Featured By Owner Dec 1, 2014  Hobbyist General Artist
Really enjoy your work and pleasantly amazed by your painting skills and talent. Can't wait to see more.
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